DWTS: Top 11 Perform

The most pressing question for me this week: will 82-year-old Cloris Leachman have a wardrobe malfunction? Seriously, she needs to put those things away. This week, the eleven couples perform either the paso doble or the rumba. These dances increase the odds of malfunction on Ms. Leachman’s part. Does it happen? Find out after the jump!

Toni Braxton & Alec Mazo

Dance: Rumba

Alec should not quit his day job. When they showed him singing Toni’s hit “Un Break My Heart,” my dog stopped to look at the TV. I notice through much of this dance, I couldn’t see Toni’s face, so I just focused on her movement. She was sexy. Those split things she did – wow!

Len says he was surprised how good the performance was. He said it lacked some fluidity. Bruno says Toni gives it, but not too much. Carrie Ann says Toni moves like she sings. She says she loved it, but there were two lifts (Toni’s feet came off the ground twice).

SCORE: 23

Brooke Burke & Derek Hough

Dance: Paso Doble

I am so impressed with Brooke! She moves like a professional! Derek worked wonders with the cape. It was a solid performance. The music had me thinking of one of those diamond commercials.

Carrie Ann says she was mesmerized. She said Brooke looked off balance a couple of times. Len says he thought Brooke portrayed the aggression very well. He said there was too much messing about at the start. Bruno says Brooke was born to dance. He says she had great timing.

SCORE:24

Rocco DiSpirito & Karina Smirnoff

Dance: Rumba

The show starts with Rocco in an apron (he’s a chef, get it?). Then, out comes Karina in a little lavender dress. I didn’t feel like Rocco did much dancing. Karina worked it. Rocko just held her in position.

Bruno says the stallion has run out of juice. Then he said he was standing there like “The Thing.” Carrie Ann says Rocco had passion, but he was lacking musicality. Len says there were more tears than cheers. He says it wasn’t really tasty.

SCORE: 16

Lance Bass & Lacey Schwimmer

Dance: Paso Doble

It was aggressive. It was a little bit like that dance when Cha Cha moves in on Danny in “Grease.” I liked it, but could have done without the kiss at the end.

Len says it doesn’t work. He wanted the cape. Carrie Ann says it was a clever song choice. She says she likes that they take big risks. Bruno says they’re brilliant to walk. Bruno says he has to present like a bull fighter, but it looked more hip hop. Len made fun of Bruno’s arm gestures.

SCORE: 20

Kim Kardashian & Mark Ballas

Dance: Rumba

Kim looked a little lost the brief time she was out of hold. And she didn’t look at Mark a whole lot. It looked like she almost lost her top at the end of the dance.

Bruno says it was colder and more distant that Siberia. He says she needs to get the character and sell it. Len says Kim has so much potential. He says the rumba has to show chemistry and hip action. He says she had all the gear in the rear. Carrie Ann says she needs to watch the playback because it looks like she’s done the same dance three times.

SCORE: 17

Misty May-Treanor & Maksim Chmerkovskiy

Dance: Paso Doble

OOOH! Maks is wearing a vest sans shirt. Now, I’m focusing on Misty. There was something off. I don’t know if she wasn’t finishing the steps or if she was scared, but something wasn’t right. The cartwheel over Maks was cool!

Carrie Ann thanked Misty for the energy in the dance. She told Maks it was ambitious choreography. Bruno called her “Xena the Warrior Princess.” He says he loved her energy, he says she puts so much power that she stumbles a little bit. Len says what she does when she is focused, Misty loses the connection with Maks.

SCORE: 21

Maurice Greene & Cheryl Burke

Dance: Rumba

This was nice. That’s all I got. Oh, and Maurice was wearing green.

Len says Maurice talked the talk, but he didn’t dance the dance. He says Maurice’s hips weren’t cooking. Carrie Ann says the choreography held him back. She wants him to project his energy outward. Bruno says he’s surprised because Maurice was rough and clunky.

SCORE: 19

Cloris Leachman & Corky Ballas

Dance: Paso Doble

Cloris had on a dark wig as part of her character. She was actually pretty good! I am impressed – and not just because she’s a senior citizen (and barely older than my grandmother).

Bruno said it was surreal. Len says it was a lovely traditional dance to traditional music. He liked the solo spins. He called a great attempt at a difficult dance. Carrie Ann says she hopes when she’s 82 that she’s half the woman as Cloris. And Carrie Ann stopped there.

SCORE: 15

Susan Lucci & Tony Dovolani

Dance: Rumba

Susan opened Tony’s shirt at the beginning. Woo! This was a cross between Pocahantas and some beach fantasy. It was S-L-O-W, but it was nice.

Carrie Ann says it was nice. She says it was smooth and elegant. Bruno says it was a good rumba, but she said Susan dances like the virgin queen – he wants more cougar. Len didn’t like it when Tony exposed himself. Len says the rumba is an actor’s dance and that’s what Susan did.

SCORE: 21

Warren Sapp & Kym Johnson

Dance: Paso Doble

I’m not gonna lie – I’m worried about Kym. If Warren uses all his strength, he could crush her! Warren definitely had his game face on. This looked like “The Matrix.” It was interesting. I kind of wish Warren hadn’t been wearing that long jacket, it was was kind of hard to see his feet. Then, I was afraid he really would crush her when he stopped at the end – they’re costumes were stuck or something.

Len says Warren looked good (and he thought Kym didn’t look bad, either). He thought it was an intense and excellent paso doble. Carrie Ann called him the paso doble killer. Bruno says “The Paso gone Matrix.” He says it was like a Lamborghini on the freeway. He says the way Warren moves his feet is fabulous.

SCORE: 24

Cody Linley & Julianne Hough

Dance: Rumba

Wow! So good! I cannot believe how young Cody is! He dances like he’s been doing this forever! How Julianne managed to go the whole dance without tripping over her dress surprised me.

Bruno says Cody needs to learn control. He says Cody has the talent. Len says it lacked a little bit of polish and finesse. He told Carrie Ann to avert her eyes because Cody is on fire. Carrie Ann says it was innocent and age appropriate. She does think Cody needs to loosen up his hips (is that creepy?).

SCORE: 21

Cloris, Kim and Rocco are all at the bottom of the leader board this week, and I think they belong there. The other couples are much stronger. I think one of them will go home – at least they should. Tuesday night, we don’t just say goodbye to one couple. Jessica Simpson performs (go ahead and boo, haters). Oh, and I know some of you want to know more about the music on the show. Go to the official DWTS page for that.

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